PSI: Backyard

[To be read in your best hardboiled accent]

     

     It all started when I heard a noise in my backyard. It was about one in the morning, an hour when folks shoulda been in bed, and the noise was horrific—grunting and thumping and screeching like you wouldn't believe. I walked over to the window, yanked back the shade, and what do you think I saw? By the light of the moon, one big fat white possum was rolling on its back, belly to the night sky, while a smaller one seemed to have it by the neck and they were scuffling, though in what manner I could not say. I went to get my camera but in my haste knocked over an earring holder, which caused an almighty clattering, and those possums hightailed it out of there faster'n you can say, I'm livin' in the sticks.

     The next morning I wondered if it had all been a dream. But I went outside and found the perps had left evidence strewn across the yard, like a calling card of shame. 

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